Turning 25

on Thursday, May 27, 2010

I'm closing in on the big 25 very quickly now. I'm not really sure how I'm handling it. Some days it doesn't seem to matter and it is just an age but then other days it feels more like a rite of passage. I'm married, I have a child, I have a career and we have an apartment. What more should I want from 25?

Turning 25 to me means that you can no longer act childish or like a young adult.  Then again, I never really did.  I didn't party too much in high school or college.  I never dressed provocatively or tried drugs.  I'm not really sure what behaviors I have that are childish and I need to stop.  My appearance does have a bit of a childish way about it.  I usually dress like a little kid in t's and jeans all the time with some worn sneakers.  Perhaps, I could add some more blouses.  It means I need to be come a healthier mommy so my daughter has a good role model. While those two things should not happen because I'm turning 25 but to me 25 can be a beginning of a whole new chapter.  A new stage in the journey of life.

When I was younger, I had this time line planned out for my life.  I'm coming to realize in the past year that things do not always turn out as planned and although my life is not what I had wished for when I was younger, it's a damn good life.  With the exception of home ownership and becoming a doctor, I have accomplished most everything on the time line just not in the order it was planned.

Here's to 25 and all the possibilities it will bring!

And, we're back...

on Tuesday, May 25, 2010

First, I'd like to point out that GERMANY was my 100th post!  Everyone reaches this milestone at their own pace but I have to admit I'm a little disappointed that it took me so long to reach.  I'm unsure of the direction this blog is taking at the moment but I do know that I want it to be more family oriented as the title is focused directly on my relationship with my husband.

Second, other than the sights in that post our trip was less than stellar due to uncontrollable circumstances on our part but very controllable on our hosts' part.  We loved the sights, sounds, smells and all the beauty that is Europe but did not enjoy our "friend"'s constant remarks about everything we suggested or said not only to her but to our child and each other as well.  Through this experience I can honestly say that my husband and I have grown closer than we have in months.  Even with the amount of sorrow we experienced from the trip not meeting expectations we realized that we are for each other the person to turn to in a crisis. With that said, we will not be visiting or conversing with her again.  Germany is not the place you intend on losing friends but it can happen anywhere even on a once in a lifetime vacation.

Finally, speaking of lifetime... to be continued


on Thursday, May 20, 2010

Back but only for a moment

on Monday, May 10, 2010

When I last posted back in February things with my marriage were up in the air.  I'm happy to report that with a lot of soul searching, crying, long talks, some screaming, counseling and cold shoulder cool downs we are doing well together.  Every day is not always good but we are having more good days than bad.

At my physical exam,some medical issues came up that I was not expecting.  No one expects a routine physical to end with a massive headache, vomiting bile and news of a miscarriage.  The worst news of all  when the doctor said he found a lump in my breast.  It turned out to be a cyst but it certainly added some prospective to life.  When you believe everything you ever hoped for would end it makes you take less for granted.  This probably also helped me to realize I didn't want my marriage to end and needed to put forth more effort in making it work.

Also because of this health scare I have been contemplating what I really want from life. I am recommitting to my 101 things goals.  I'm going to review them and determine which are able to be accomplished and which I need to realize won't happen by goal date.  This will have to wait until after the 20th, however; because WE'RE GOING TO GERMANY